it happen again..

again n again... i let my self be such a fool person... again n again i fell into this hell.. ape salah aku...

if i doesnt mean anything to u... u shuldnt make me fell this way.... did u know hw much this feeling hurt.... dnt u know??? sedihnyer.... everything u've said made me feel so special in ur eyes.. but in fact... im nothing... i has no value to u.. everything tht i did... never able to impress u... its hurt... i never wish to fell again... u made me... dnt u know hw much i love u... i waited for u to get online... but u left me alone... u told me u want me to be ur side... but the reality is.. u always push me away... i never know wht i did wrong....dnt u know ur ignorance really hurt me deep inside.... too late for me to step away... i cant.. today... i realized... neither my presence nor my absence.... doesnt make any dif to u...or u mayb dnt even realized... i was fool.. to think tht everything u wrote was for me... in fact it wasnt.. it belong to other person... y u lie to me.. if u dnt feel the way i feel tell me i'll be ok with tht for sure n tht will be less painful thn this....

it was 2 am in egypt... whre 8 a.m in malaysia... i set my alrm to wake me up... at 2 a.m because u'll get online.. i was so happy seeing ur nick appeared on my screen... but u a bit bz... nevermind.. it urs working hour.. i do understand... then u left me... without saying anything... my heart hurt.. then im off to bed with tears running my cheeks..

when i woke in da morning i saw ur offline msgs.. it was enuf to make me forgot waht happen what u did last nite...

the next morning was the same.... i'll get used to it..

till today... erm.. no words able to describe wat i felt right now.. while im writting this post... i was at the bottom of my spirit... iam not able to stand.. it was too painful.. thnks to u syg.. one thing i want u to know is.. i do love u.. erm